Surveillance on James P. Rochester
LITTLE-KNOWN NONSENSE ABOUT THE WORD-ASSEMBLER
James P. Rochester is a very private, reclusive person. He was last known to be raising llamas in Uruguay. He is a man of naturally poor talents and pained in disposition or that. His relatives often deny any resemblance and he has no spare time.
0070: Not Dead Yet
NO TIME
TO DINE
0070: NOT DEAD YET by James P. Rochester is a dry observational action-comedy misadventure with a hint of international and multi-generational disconnection. Herbert Bigglesby is an 84-year-old former superspy now forced into an obscure early retirement. Trapped in a senior community he refuses to fade quietly. He is convinced danger and stupidity lie behind every policy and assurance, with sabotage, betrayal, and assassination (including of character) always at the ready. And if the indignities of aging are not enough, he risks it all to take on scammers and do-gooders in this wild first novel by Rochester.
Why You’ll Love It (or at least relate)
Unique twists on classic spy life and lore
A past that insists on catching up
Villains who mean well
Dysfunctional fun for the holed up, held up, and extended family
Weâve got you covered!
0070: Not Dead Yet is available in multiple formats to suit every reader’s weakness.
Young Adult Cover Revealed!
0070: Not Dead Yet
0070: NOT DEAD YET by James P. Rochester is a dry observational action-comedy misadventure with a hint of international and multi-generational disconnection. Herbert Bigglesby is an 84-year-old former superspy now forced into an obscure early retirement. Trapped in a senior community he refuses to fade quietly. He is convinced danger and stupidity lie behind every policy and assurance, with sabotage, betrayal, and assassination (including of character) always at the ready. And if the indignities of aging are not enough, he risks it all to take on scammers and do-gooders in this wild first novel by Rochester.
Paperback Edition
$19.22
Hardcover Collectorâs Edition
$19.22
E-Book Edition
$19.22
Audiobook
$19.22
The Story of 0070: Not Dead Yet
The Spy WhoâŚ
Should Probably Call It A Day
Meet Herbert Bigglesby, aka Agent 0070the world’s most confident and least self-questioning superspyâdespite a mountain of mounting evidence to his contrarian octogenarian ways. Carrying a sense of license, heâs out to right the wrongs of all and call a scammer a scammer, no matter what it takes or leaves in the process.
- Will Herbert live to save another day?
- Will he enjoy retirement as a civilian and give up his former pro state?
- Will he break hearts and bones along the way?
- Will you laugh in the mirror?
Find out in life itself or heretofore within, notwithstanding!
Find Out In
0070: Not Dead Yet
The Imaginal Faces of 0070: Not Dead Yet
Meet Some Characters
Rochester has assembled a cast of misfits yet to be cast! For now we have
these virtual sketches of reality for you to dabble on or drivel over.
Rebecca
When life blesses you with this kind of outrageous beauty, what else are you supposed to trade on, intellectual development? This one-trick, dynamic 20-something is fun to watch as she lures hapless seniors to a free cruise, hoping their legacies will help her achieve financial independence and solve the worldâs healthcare problems.
Danny
Danny stands at 4'5" and holds a day job helping Mr. Le Deuce promote healthsharing. However, he is more interested in his side hustle of selling investment opportunities in PreciousFabrics, offering innovative new textiles. He also has a penchant for hoping there will be a Fourth Reich.
Rosie
A cheerful metallic grin and hard jaw line sets this optimistic and retired international assassin apart. She too is having a hard time leaving the life she knows, but you canât say she isnât trying. And to her credit, she has done more work on herself than if Cher had become a plastic surgeon and gone full throttle on herself. Except itâs more of a spiritual transformation, in her mind.
The Twins
These two big boys are mostly into technology and dancing but occasionally get dragged into practical bill-paying tasks, judgmentally referred to as "dirty work.â Sit back as they enjoyably cause Herbert some discomfort as he dodges and shuffles himself out of many a harmâs way.
Dr. Henric Vilefinger
This misunderstood genius has done a lot of evil in his life, objectively speaking. And he too has difficulty letting life play out, or giving up former interests and pursuits. Thus, stroke or no stroke, he's not about to stop leaving his mark on this world.
Mrs. Pearbottom
There is more mystery than meets the eye to this matronly 60-something director of Sunset View Senior Living. And not just because she was once a highly coveted undercover and valued member of a secret government organization. For decades she sent Bigglesby out to save the constantly endangered world of Western civilization while never quite free of thinking ahead about what to make for dinner later.
Herbert Bigglesby
Renowned but aged superspy, hanging on at 84. Heâs had one embarrassment too many, leading to his now-enforced retirement. In an undisclosed location, far from his former days of clarity and action. Itâs no longer the London Fog he should worry about but the everyday one. But heâs a great champion of there being more to life than waiting for death.
Olivia
Meet this surprising mid-50s Bolivian peasant turned killer-for-hire! Sheâs been a hardy single mom responsibly weathering the challenges of poor life choices. She has known what itâs like to consistently put food on the table, come rain, shine, or technically murder. She hasnât had time to quibble with the quacks of human development in raising her boys, only righting the wrongs of civil society. Official regimes be jailed! She often thinks. But now sheâs done her time in the trenches and itâs time to set things right for herself.
Dr Bentiron
This part-time psychiatrist at the senior community is hard for Herbert to relate to. Thereâs probably more to him than meets the eye, but itâs hard to get a straight answer from someone only used to asking all the questions.
E. Claire Voyant
This young nimble yoga-promoting physical therapist trainee is unfazed by Herbertâs backward advances at the nursing home. She doesnât crumble under his inappropriate invitations to take their therapy into more private regions. Everyone can have an old demented unfiltered relative, she reasons.
Mr. LeDeuce
Mr. Le Deuce is reminiscent of someone who could run a mysterious island where dreams and nightmares come true. Founder of a healthsharing alternative to third party insurance, he shows a true passion for solving access to healthcare for all through senior commitments of their legacies.
Olga Gargledu
This severe 60-something Latvian physical therapist is as undeterrable as Herbert. She would like the old man to notice her, to surrender himself to her, to let her do all the things she knows she can do to make a man happy. But some hopes are not worth holding out for. Except to the one who does so.
Dr. Singleton
This preacher does more to motivate Herbert against scams than any other person or personal observation. This single-minded man calls for long-term investments and deep conversions among the aged, wounded, hurt, and lonely. Can he be for real or only out to reel in suckers?
Latest Updates & Blog
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Stay in the loop with fresh wipes, behind-the-curtains drama, and sneak peeks at Herbertâs private site. From book news to bonus content â it all spills here first.
0070: Now in Audiobook
Hear the Action.
Feel the Parody.
The action doesnât just stay on the pageâit jumps straight into your ears. 0070: The Audiobook delivers thrilling narration, sharp humor, and all the spy-spoof energy youâve been waiting for.
- Available On
What people are said to be saying (if you believe any of it).
SCAMTIMONIALS
0070 on Screen
From Novel to Blockbuster
This deal has not been finalized. Please send suggestions for directors, actors,
financing, and other roles to movie@0070notdeadyet.com
Film Will Be Featured On
Hear the Adventure, Live the Laughs
Eavesdrop!
Get a sneak peek into Herbert Bigglesby’s wild side â from espionage to elder neglect. You
won’t want to miss thrills, spills, and laughs. Help us be a hit, man! Press Play
First Mission Disaster or Masterpiece?
It is a long established fact that a reader will be distracted by the readable content.
The Spy Gadgets That Shouldnât Exist
It is a long established fact that a reader will be distracted by the readable content.
Villain Monologues Gone Wrong
It is a long established fact that a reader will be distracted by the readable content.
Conspiracies Revealed
Scams & Secrets
Beneath the banter and bingo something sinister is abrewing. Is he paranoid or just paying attention? Whatâs going on in your environments? What scams and hatcheries are at play in your world?
It’s not just about winning â it’s about being admired while doing it. Thereâs no thirst like the thirst for attention and praise. Luckily Herbert is not one to be forgotten!
Retirement hasn’t dulled Herbertâs taste for danger â or vodka.
At Sunset View, the lack of tequila killa da mood⌠until a happy hour finally arrives!
Even in the most flawed and dysfunctional of families, all is not as its sheens, it seems. Secrets lurk and whispers rustle about your personal heroics behind the pain. Many a parent lost an âiâ a very long time ago!